"Going to war without the French is like going deer hunting without your accordion" (General Norman Schwarzkopf during the war with Iraq).

Best and Most Famous Bitchiest comment ever. "My dear, the T is silent, as in Harlot". (Lady Margot Asquith to the actress Jean Harlow who rudely and wrongly addressed Lady Asquith by her first name then stupidly mispronounced it).

"You'll never amount to anything" (Teacher to a young Albert Einstein).

"People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it" (George Bernard Shaw)

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on" (Dean Martin)

"I couldn't possibly agree with you - then we'd both be wrong!" (I suspect, Brian Clough)

"If I need your opinion, I'll give it to you" (Definately Brian Clough)

"There's less to him than meets the eye"

"I couldn't possibly agree with you because then we'd both be wrong" (Anon)

"I told you I was sick" (Spike Milligan's parting shot, on his headstone)

"A person who never made a mistake, new tried anything new!" (Albert Einstein)

"That's another day less to live"(Tony Hancock)

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch" (Anon)

"You can never hear a pin drop, but you could hear it land!" (Stephen Fry)

"To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research." (Wilson Misner)

"The party was a great success, until someone found a hammer" (Anon)

"Nowadays, people know the price of everything and the value of nothing" (Wilde)

"Disappointment is temporary, regret is forever" (Bob Hoskins)

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From the 'never to be published' book, THE RAMBLINGS OF AN ORDINARY BLOKE