The Dinner Party, one of my all-time favourite pastimes. Little can beat the fun, banter, fascinating (or daft) conversations and basic all-round good time of a well-organised, carefully prepared Dinner Party with a few close friends.

Your guests arrive looking forward to the evening, collapse into the sofa quickly feeling part of it, a welcoming drink, plenty of nibbles, laugh and chat, then to the table which looks fabulous. An evening out at even the best of restaurants comes a poor second.

And the benchmark of all great Dinner Parties is when someone then spots the clock and says (often with a slightly alcoholic note of surprise) "Blimey, do you know it's 2 o' clock!" and everyone realises that they've been so entrenched in the evening that they have been sitting at the table for over 6 hours!

They don't have to be excessively formal, indeed, they don't have to be formal at all, but memorable Dinner Parties don't just happen; they take an awful lot of careful thought and preparation.

So here it is. Woody's totally self-indulgent 10 Commandments of The Dinner Party.

1: CREATE YOUR MENU FOR YOUR GUESTS – NOT FOR YOU

Hosting a Dinner Party is not about showing off your culinary skills (or lack of them) or producing food that YOU love. It's about entertaining and preparing food for your guests.

This means really knowing your guests very well or, if necessary, asking them!

Plan your menu with consideration of your guest's likes and dislikes and think about allergies, religion, time of year, the weather and even your guest's attitude towards food.

You don't insult someone who enjoys elaborate cuisine with a giant, homely stew, nor should you give elaborate nouvelle dishes to someone who only eats simple basic fare as it may embarrass them and make them feel uncomfortable. If necessary, be prepared to cook more than one meal…they are, after all, your guests!

2: CREATE YOUR MENU THAT WORKS TOGETHER

Think of the balance of the menu. Generally the first course is naturally fairly light, followed by a more substantial main course and finished with a pudding of some description.

But whether you're serving 3 or 4 courses (or even more?) the balance of the 'whole' menu is so important and that means considering the weight of each dish (in richness and texture) the content of each dish (different materials and foods) and even the colour and design of each dish.

The menu should be carefully designed to be totally interesting from start to finish and certainly not leave your guests feeling like beached whales.

Also, of course, the parts of each dish should marry well together. You may think that this sounds obvious, but I've been in many a decent restaurant where some very experienced chefs have got this worryingly wrong!

3: CREATE YOUR MENU THAT'S PRACTICAL

This is a mistake that so many people make – trying to be too clever.

To begin with, when you go into that expensive restaurant and your 3 or 4 courses arrive on time and perfect, remember that out the back in the kitchen is possibly an army of people (the brigade) working their culinary socks off doing their own special things.

At home, there's just you…and the cooker…and the clock…so it's important to prepare a menu that's practical for one person to cook and prepare easily.

Some dishes are also very time & attention intense up to serving (i.e. Risotto) and others you can simply remove from the fridge or cooker – and serve.

You don't want three courses that all demand a great deal of kitchen attention or you'll never get them to the table and you'll never get out of the kitchen (another benchmark of a successful Dinner Party – the cooking host is rarely in the kitchen!).

It's also sensible to remember that some great dishes require great cooking skills which you may not have and you are probably cooking this complicated affair that you've taken from Jean-Christophe Novelli's latest book for the very first time (not clever).

These are your guests, not guinea pigs.

4: MAKE SURE EVERYTHING IS COOKED AND PREPARED PERFECTLY

Again, this may sound obvious, but so often the major effort and attention goes into the main event of a meal and so many other elements are disappointing also-rans.

To prepare a full 3-course meal (including sauces, canapés, garnishes and bread) could involve perhaps 20 or 30 different items of food and every one of them demands your equal attention – and that means taste, texture, heat (if applicable) and appearance.

All the finest cooks in the world know this and it really is a matter of total preparation, mental scheduling then constantly taste, check…and taste again!

5: MAKE SURE EVERYTHING LOOKS GREAT AND IS PRESENTED PERFECTLY

A very controversial area amongst some chefs, but one that I have no doubts about at all.

Whilst flavour is paramount, food should look fabulous as we really do eat with our eyes and food that looks awful probably tastes awful (even if it doesn't, so to speak because of that pre-conception).

Indeed, the brilliant Heston Blumenthal (Best Restaurant in the World, 2 years running, possibly worth listening to) takes it even further as he believes that you not only eat with your eyes, but also with your nose, your ears and your memory, and all senses play a vital part in enjoying food.

So, when you're preparing a dish, think how it will look, think about colours, textures and the design on the plate – and look through recipe books to pick up visual hints.

When you then put the dish in front of your guests, the first second or two says it all. "Wow that looks amazing!"

Or not.

6: MAKE SURE YOU ALWAYS BUY THE BEST POSSIBLE RAW MATERIALS

It is major part of every cook's education that they learn to understand the quality of the raw material they need for their menu and unfortunately if the standard is poor then with the best will in the world, the dish will also be poor.

I have actually watched cooks in open restaurant kitchens examine raw materials – meats, fish, vegetable and fruit and, if unhappy, simply throw them in the bin (probably meaning a supplier will get a rocket in the morning).

Unfortunately, in the UK, food shops don't take kindly to customers picking up and sniffing their wares, unlike on the Continent, but there are still many snippets of information that you can glean from books, the internet and good old fashioned experience to help you establish the quality of your materials – before you buy!

7: THINK THROUGH ALL THE DRINKS

A major part of the Party is the drinks that you offer your guests from the moment they arrive to the end of the meal.

Pre-dinner drink: When your guests arrive they'll probably want a pre-drink immediately (mine usually do!) so have that ready. It could be wines, or beers, sherry, as gin & tonic, a more exotic Bellini or even, at the height of summer, a jug of Sangria.

But avoid a large choice – have 3 or 4 drinks to offer and don't forget the soft drinks!

Wine: Naturally, if you're reasonably knowledgable about wines try to match your specific choices to the meals (i.e. a delicate fish sings out for a light citrussy white and a light Fleurie red is wasted on rich game) but if not at least think of the basics.

Think of your menu, of course, but also think of your guests – and I know some who simply do not drink red wine and some who won't touch white. Don't forget rose and perhaps even a well-chilled dessert wine.

After dinner drinks: Again, think them through and have them ready – brandy & port certainly plus 3 or 4 liqueurs.

Water: At every Dinner Party I have a bottomless jug of chilled water on the table often flavoured with lemon or lime, something the Americans and Mediterranean countries do religiously - and the Brits hopelessly.

Coffee (and Tea): An excellent meal simply isn't complete without the final of the relaxing brandy and perfectly brewed coffee...and don't forget the tea. More and more people these days ask for tea after a meal, and why not?

I put a great deal of effort into both buying good brands of coffee and even blending them myself (and sometimes add the odd tablespoon of brandy or other flavouring into the jug which adds an additional richness to it).

But as with all parts of the Party, make sure all your drinks are well thought out, good quality, well-chilled (where necessary) and…don't forget those who are driving and those who simply don't drink alcohol at all.

8: THINK THROUGH EVERYTHING ELSE

Apart from the food and the drink there are still a few other things to consider and again it can be as formal or as laid-back as you wish as long as it achieves the atmosphere you wish to give your guests.

Firstly, naturally, there is the table. I sometimes spend over half an hour simply preparing a table for a Dinner Party ensuring that everything is laid perfectly (I hate to see cutlery and place mats 'thrown' onto a table unless it's a real, rustic, informal thing) and that includes polishing glasses and silver, folding napkins, side plates, candles, maybe flowers, always canapés and sometimes, just for a giggle, even place names and a event-personalised printed menu.

Secondly, music. I always have a good think about my impending guests and select half a dozen CDs especially for them. I know most of our friend's taste in music and also most of their 'distaste' equally important and all part of the make-up of the evening.

Thirdly, nibbles and bits – making sure that wherever anyone plonks themselves down before dinner that there is a drinks mat and a bowl or two of nibbles within easy reach.

Lastly, smoking. Yes people still do and whether you like it or not they're your guests and you need to cater for the smokers which these days usually means a couple of chairs, table and an ashtray out on the patio (or even in the conservatory if you have one – you may be a smoker yourself) but never in the dining room, please.

9: THINK THROUGH YOUR GUESTS THOROUGHLY

Ahh. This is probably the most difficult part to explain.

This is about considering your guests personally and individually.

And this could mean simply remembering a birthday or a wedding anniversary and you could surprise them with a little cake (or even a personalised, celebratory, designer pudding!) or a special toast with a relevant drink.

It could be that someone is off on a holiday to somewhere you know well so you could surprise them with a little bundle of books or local information (not a slide show of pictures, please!).

It could be that two of your guests have something important in common and they don't know (but you do) and you could introduce them to the fact, being careful, of course, not to cause any trouble with other halves. It has been known! It could be that there is something or some subject that is best kept unmentioned and this can be a little difficult, a little like the Faulty Towers 'don't mention the war!".

I remember once, in my Saatchi days, having lunch with 2 people who didn't know each other. One was a dog fanatic (bred them, showed them, sold them, never stopped talking about them) and the other had just lost his beloved 12 year old Labrador and was hopelessly devastated.

I think you get my drift. A quiet pre-lunch word with the former was required.

10: PLAN AHEAD AND BE COMPLETELY IN CONTROL

And last but certainly not least.

I say 'last' ironically because it's really the 'first' and most important thing to consider, and that is being totally prepared.

You haven't got that army in the kitchen to help you, there's just you and you probably haven't got endless workspace or three giant fridges so organisation is paramount.

The Dinner Party takes 5 processes to complete; firstly the Planning (the menu, shopping lists, equipment and any other items that you'll need), secondly, the Shopping (and checking that you have all ingredients and equipment that you'll need for cooking and serving), thirdly the Prepping (preparing and pre-cooking everything you'll need as far as possible in advance, fourthly, the actual Cooking procedure prior to serving, and finally the Serving and enjoying!

1. Once you've planned your menu, then itemise ALL your ingredients against each individual dish, then from this produce your complete shopping list (including all food, drink, flowers and anything else – and checking that you actually do have that packet of gelatine in the cupboard) and knowing exactly where and when you need to buy it.

2. Then, check through ALL the cooking and serving equipment that you'll need and, assuming you have the space, get the lot out ready to use.

3. Then, write yourself out list of all the dishes that you intend to serve (bread, Canapé, Starter, Sorbet, Main, Pudding, Sauces, Garnishes etc) and beside them write another list of all the separate elements that make up each dish and plonk it on the fridge with one of those silly magnets.

4. You can then work your way through this entire second list, possibly well in advance (even the day before) preparing and even cooking some of these items as far as possible and getting them stored into the fridge ready to go.

5. Then, do the rest! The table, the music, the nibbles, the drinks, in fact everything else that you really don't want to have to worry about when you have more important things to do, like cooking and sitting with your guests!

6. Then, relax for a while and literally think it through. Sit there in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, look at your list on the fridge for a few minutes and think through the whole cooking and serving process making sure that all the food you need is prepped up and ready to use, all the cooking utensils you'll need along the way are out ready, sitting on the worktop and all the serving bits you'll need are also ready waiting to be used.

Don't leave anything to chance and make sure that you don't have to do a single thing extra during the final cooking process – when your guests are there!

7. Pour yourself a large drink, put your feet up and watch the telly for a while, You deserve it. (But maybe double check in your head that everything's ready).

8. Depending on your menu, the final cooking process can then be as easy as pie (excuse that!) and often start even after your guests have arrived – and that's really cool.

So there we have it. 10 rules to help make a perfect Dinner Party – for you as well as your guests.

Have a nice evening.

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From the 'never to be published' book, COOKING IN A CUPBOARD